Rewritten: If God loves everyone, why does he send people who don't believe in Him to Sheol? Sending someone to eternal torture seems contradictory to loving them.
There are things in the Bible that God hates, correct? So, in that way, he can't be 'all-loving'.
I won't go into this portion of the question too much, but God does punish people for disobeying his commandments. Whether or not He has a right to do this, is another question for another time.
(There is a lot of bias on the internet on these two points, so it took a long time to sift through it all.)
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Sheol/Hades are the same thing but translated into different languages. (she'ohl' is Hebrew, hai'des is Greek)
When the Bible refers to a burial place or a mass burial place, it uses different words.
Also, it mentions that Sheol is spacious, continuously hungry, and is never satisfied.
The Bible also speaks of a resurrection, so those 'asleep' in death await in Sheol/Hades for that.
Jesus mentioned that when Lazarus was dead, he was sleeping, meaning two things: He wasn't aware of anything around him and that eventually he would wake up.
So in conclusion about Sheol/Hades, it's the 'common grave' of mankind, not a literal place. There's no eternal torture here, since you can't torture someone who's 'unconcious'.
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Gehenna is a completely different thing.
Back in Israel, it was essentially a garbage dump, where fire burned garbage, dead animals, and DEAD humans who were not fitting of a burial.
There is no mention in the Bible of living people being thrown into the literal Gehenna.
The Bible refers to Gehenna also as the 'lake of fire, which means the second death'.
So if Sheol/Hades is the 'first death' where a person awaits resurrection, then what would the second death mean?
What would happen to a body if it were thrown into a literal lake of fire? There would be no more body.
(Illustration: If someone had suffocated, you could revive them with CPR. Could you do so if you threw their dead body into a fire? Not likely.)
So it is the same with Gehenna. It's the second death, meaning one with no hope of being resurrected.
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So in short:
Sheol/Hades is the figurative common grave of mankind, where those awaiting a resurrection are.
Gehenna is figuratively the everlasting destruction (not torture) of those who are not deserving of a resurrection.
There is no eternal torture.