| Interstellar Correspondence Transmitter: | The Iron Manta Approved by The Deep Council of Blistermarsh
| | Recipient: | Deep Council Expenses and Claims Department
| | Content: |
Dear Expenses and Claims,
I am aware this is the 17th occurrence in my career as an Orbit Admiral I have submitted an Emergency Expenses Adjustment, but I assure you, this was entirely necessary for operational purposes.
From a purely economical point of view, securing a artifact of the ancients will surely pay for the damage to the Iron Manta's Landing Barb, the starboard fin, and Mechanic Solaris' medical bills.
Please see the attached mission plan for Operation Stingray. Everything went to plan, the Landing Barb pierced the alien cruiser's hull, and Spacetrooper Russian, Mechanic Solaris and myself were able to safely disembark through the Landing Barb. Russian and I proceeded to the artifact's location in the ship's brig, as Mapper Espithel's vision indicated, and as he guided us via comms link.
Now, the actual heist went without a hitch. We froze then shattered the brig's blast doors, blinded the guards with squid ink, blew the safe's locks with a puffer fish and used Mind Flayers to make the damn priests forget why they were there when they showed up. That was funny.
Anyway the main problem was caused because we hadn't realised we had pierced the ships fuel tank when we deployed the landing barb. When we arrived back at the barb, Mechanic Solaris, who we had left to guard the barb, was using all 8 of his tentacles to plug spurting gouts of high octane rocket-fuel. He was holding on to the barb with his teeth to stop it being shot off into space.
We boarded the barb, and dragged petrol soaked Solaris with us, and I ordered Espithel to retract the stinger. Unfortunately, as the barb scraped out of the ship's hull, it caused a spark, and the barb's tip caught flame. That caused us so much terror you wouldn't believe, because as I told the crew, the most important thing in our voyage is to not cause collateral damage to the ship or any civilization that may end up invoicing the Expenses and Claims Department. We were all so concerned with the Barb catching fire that we didn't realise Mechanic Solaris was engulfed too until we started smelling calamari.
Anyway I sorted it all out, I got Espithel to stop laughing, and he re-calibrated the barb to land in our own accountancy office in the starboard fin, and the internal water quenched the flames. I figured that was the best place to go for as nobody has used the accountancy office all voyage. Unfortunately that means I now have had to send you this missive from the bar.
Attached are Solaris's medical reports and the pre-mission report for Op Stingray.
OA JCJ
| | Attachments: | Spoiler for Op Stingray:
It is too dangerous to employ teleportation channels at this speed to an unknown craft. The margin for error is too great, and even a meter out and we could be teleported into a wall or an engine. However, we have theorized a potential solution.
As you are aware, when landing safely on any planet, we use our long landing stinger to anchor the Iron Manta to the planet, calibrating the landing barb to ground level. We then descend the stinger and exit through the landing barb.
If we calibrate the landing barb to sink into the center of the alien ship, it will plunge there, thinking it was landing on a planet. The margin for error is the entire breadth of the alien ship. The crew will be protected within the barb, so hitting an engine will not be lethal, and if we miss altogether the stinger will just dangle in space and we can try again.
The Iron Manta's speed will then easily be brought to match the alien ship's speed, and we can disembark.
If our piercing location is catastrophic for the alien ship, our own thrusters can bear the load of their ship for a few minutes, and once everyone is safely back within the barb, we can jettison and leave the broken alien ship to float off into space.
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