Elements the Game Forum - Free Online Fantasy Card Game

Other Topics => Off-Topic Discussions => Humor => Topic started by: Helios on June 08, 2010, 09:37:41 pm

Title: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Helios on June 08, 2010, 09:37:41 pm

Helios' Guide on how to Guarantee Getting Kicked-Out

Simply register with any of the following character profiles:


Name: The Destroyer

Element: :darkness

Race: Uber-gods

History: The Destroyer is the uber-god of destruction; he was born before Time itself, and can destroy anything.

Abilities: Destroyer - Instantly destroys anything.

***

Name: The Killer

Element: :death

Race: The Extremely Powerful Ancient Deities (EPAD)

History: The Killer is an EPAD who can kill anyone and can kill as many people as he wants simultaneously.

Abilities: Kill - Instantly kill x number of people, x has no restrictions.

***

*Note: What is particularly amusing is that this one was actually submitted in an RPG here.
**Character name removed to avoid allusions to a specific member.

Character Name:
Race:TRUE god
Element:OBVIOUSLY :fire
Appearance:like a immortal
Age:about 30
Background:born as a human, drafted into the army of fire, rose through the ranks to false god, then challenged the true god of fire and won.
Belongings: upped fire shield, upped fahrenheit
Abilities: rain of fire (does six damage to each enemy)
fire bolt(30 damage instant, no extra)
ablaze(+4/+0)
rage pot (+10/-5)
explosion(destroy 3 permanants)

***

Name: God

Element: :aether :air :darkness :death :earth :entropy :fire :gravity :life :light :time :water

Race: God

History: He is God.

Abilities: God - Instantly does anything and everything.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Demagog on June 08, 2010, 10:14:14 pm

You forgot mine... He was aether and existed only in another dimension where he couldn't be harmed, and he could call forth aether beings into the real world to do his bidding.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Bloodshadow on June 09, 2010, 03:17:53 am

That :fire god character made me LOL. :) Can't believe someone actually submitted that...

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Wardead on June 09, 2010, 10:09:48 pm

That's nothing compared to my awesome ones. I'll give you some.

1.

Name: Zanzarino

Element: All

Background: He created Elements.

Abilities:

Ban: You're dead.

Win: He wins the RPG, and you can't do anything about it.

______________________________________________________________________

2.

Name: Chuck Norris

Element: He ain't needin one!

Background: He painted it white.

Abilities:

Roundhouse kicks: He roundhouse kicks you.

Punch: You're bashed in the face.

______________________________________________________________________

3.

Name: Jonathan

Element:  :darkness

Background: He is the Master of Darkness.

Abilities:

RPG: He controls the RPG.

______________________________________________________________________

4.

Name: Wardead The Great

Element: Void

Background: None

Abilities:

Awesome: He kills the RPG by annoying them and God-modding.

______________________________________________________________________

5.

Name: Jmizze

Element:  :entropy

Background: Don't know

Abilities:

All cards: He uses all cards and you can't stop him.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Helios on June 10, 2010, 12:13:40 am

Quote from: Wardead on June 09, 2010, 10:09:48 pm

3.

Name: Jonathan

Element:  :darkness

Background: He is the Master of Darkness.

Abilities:

RPG: He controls the RPG.

Ah, now I understand: Blood's character had a concealed and secret sixth ability all along. How OP! ;)

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: icybraker on June 10, 2010, 12:31:29 am

Name: Chuck Norris

Element: He ain't needin one!

Background: He painted it white.

Abilities:

Roundhouse kicks: He roundhouse kicks you.

Punch: You're bashed in the face.

INCORRECT

---

Name: Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris warrants no description.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Bloodshadow on June 10, 2010, 01:43:44 am

Quote from: Helios on June 10, 2010, 12:13:40 am

Ah, now I understand: Blood's character had a concealed and secret sixth ability all along. How OP! ;)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

You found out my ultra secret ability! How did you do it?! :o :P

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Wardead on June 10, 2010, 12:18:13 pm

He did all the time. Which is the most OP among my 5 characters?


I think Wardead is the awesomest!

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: miniwally on June 10, 2010, 03:47:05 pm

If we're pointing out errors :P

3.

Name: Jonathan

Element:  :darkness

Background: He was the Master of Darkness.

Abilities:

RPG: He controls the RPG.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Wardead on June 10, 2010, 09:19:51 pm

Well, he is in an RPG. And no offense guys.

And new ones:

Name: PuppyChow

Element:  :time

Background: ...

Abilities:

Mind Read: He counter-counter bluffs you in a battle.

Dogfood: He eats Dogfood and gains super-doggy strength.

Woof: He Woofs! you to death.

Switch: He betrays  :time and goes to  :earth.

______________________________________________________________________

Name: Icybraker

Element:  :aether

Background: No Idea

Abilities:

Ego: He brags about himself, and you die hearing his stories.

Lie: He tricks (lies) and fools you.

Icy: He is Icy.

______________________________________________________________________

Name: 1337

Element: 1337ness

Background: Programmed in 600613 1337

Abilities:

C0d3z: H3 c0d3z y0u, 7uRn1n y0u 1337.

1337 P0W@#: D3$7R0Y!!!

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Wardead on June 16, 2010, 01:27:59 pm

Some more! No offense.


Name: Helios

Element:  :light

Background: Was an Angel in Heaven.

Abilities:

Long Writing: He kills you with long writing.

Similarities: He can switch to a Bloodshadow or Purity_Riot character.

______________________________________________________________________

Name: Demagog

Element: ...

Background: Has been always loving animals...

Abilities:

MOOO!: He Moo's like a Holy Cow.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: icybraker on June 16, 2010, 01:32:13 pm

Dude, you totally messed up my background.

---

Name: Icybraker

Element: :aether

Background: Unknown, but he dies when he get shot by Implosion

Abilities:

Lose: Icybraker loses this fight, causing his adoring fans to destroy his opponent in the next fight.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Wardead on June 16, 2010, 01:37:33 pm

I forgot.

Name: Implosion

Element:  :light

Background: Programmed to kill Icy.

Abilities:

Fu*k you!: He kills Icy.

Zombie: Icy turns into a zombie, and Implosion kills him again.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: icybraker on June 16, 2010, 01:40:30 pm

Name: zac333
Element: Unknown
Background: Some random dude on the forums
Abilities:
Mother: He turns into your mother, fools you, and then laughs at you.
Flash Video: Target PuppyChow gains +100 Speed. Target Jmizzle gains 123,456,789 rainbow decks. Target Scaredgirl gains a dead body and a Banhammer. Kill target Icybraker and target Zanzarino.

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: Wardead on June 16, 2010, 01:47:30 pm

He is probably  :entropy


And new one!!!!

Name: Jumbalumba

Element:  :gravity

Background: Ze silent one.

Abilities:

Jumba Smash!: He smashes you to pulps.

______________________________________________________________________

Name: TerroKing

Element:  :earth

Background: Earth

Abilities:

Win: He never loses. Never ever. No one can ever beat him, not even Chuck Norris!

Title: Re: How Not To Enter an RPG
Post by: $$$man on June 18, 2010, 07:40:54 am

how is this

name: $$$man

Background: well........shut up

Abilities:

name change
SG/rasta/other ppl calls him @$$ man
Azumi Calls him rapper