Funny card ideas

[ninjamaster1991]

A topic for any funny, awesome, or just plain stupid card ideas.

I'll go first:

Oracle|Oracle
Permanent
0: You get a nymph, permanently.

[ArtCrusade]

Name: "Telling of the Pointless Knight"
Type: Epic Spell
Effect: Opens a new tab in your enemy's browser. He's forced to watch the telling of the Pointless Knight, a legendary hero who's already slayed 1,000s of dragons using the power of his boring stories while you overrun your enemy with a full field of "Knights with a Meaning" (Atk:20, Def:20, Lifesteal). If your opponent somehow decides to close the newly opened tab, his game session ends and you win his account.


I'll add information about the "Telling of the Pointless Knight" as I see the need to add this card to the game, and immediatly. There's just no reason this one hasn't been added yet, and I see no problems balancewise

[Raptor6789]

Chuck Norris|*
creature
cost: 1337 any quanta
99/99|*
text: if chuck norris deals damage, you win the game.
momentum

* - chuck norris cannot be upgraded.

[oblivion523]

Chuck Norris|*
creature
99/99|*
text: if chuck norris deals damage, you win the game.
momentum

* - chuck norris cannot be upgraded.

I knew that someone would make a Chuck Norris card. I just knew it. Oh well, might as well contribute.

Justin Bieber
1|1
Ability: High Pitched noise: Effect of shockwave increased to 8 damage to every creature on field.

Zanzarino
5000|5000
Ability: Zanzarino: Automatically win and get opponent's account and all their cards and electrum.

[Blazing Moonwalker]

Gift: Give your opponent 6 floodings if he uses a water based deck.

Nuke 'EM: Nuke the entire field (including the opponent's HP), and Restore your HP to full.

Pandemonium: Inflict a random effect on every creature on the field.

[nerd1]

Gift: Give your opponent 6 floodings if he uses a water based deck.

Nuke 'EM: Nuke the entire field (including the opponent's HP), and Restore your HP to full.

Pandemonium: Inflict a random effect on every creature on the field.

last one already exists.

barrage of smileys
spell
3 random quanta
effect:
  8) ??? YOU JUST GOT PONED!!!
which means that while your opponent is reading the text on the card you break into his/her house and steal their cookies, which you might want to do as YOU NOW HAVE A COOKIE SHORTAGE!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
better check your pantry 

[Blazing Moonwalker]

Gift: Give your opponent 6 floodings if he uses a water based deck.

Nuke 'EM: Nuke the entire field (including the opponent's HP), and Restore your HP to full.

Pandemonium: Inflict a random effect on every creature on the field.

last one already exists.

Really? >_>

It's still funny

[ninjamaster1991]

Weegee
98|98, immaterial, momentum
puts a Mini-Weegee in every one of your opponent's creature slots.


Mini-Weegee
0|314, immaterial
Mini-Weegee starts out aflatoxined.

[ninjamaster1991]

I knew that someone would make a Chuck Norris card. I just knew it. Oh well, might as well contribute.

Justin Bieber
1|1
Ability: High Pitched noise: Effect of shockwave increased to 8 damage to every creature on field.

Zanzarino
5000|5000
Ability: Zanzarino: Automatically win and get opponent's account and all their cards and electrum.

Bieber should be a 0|1.

[nerd1]

I knew that someone would make a Chuck Norris card. I just knew it. Oh well, might as well contribute.

Justin Bieber
1|1
Ability: High Pitched noise: Effect of shockwave increased to 8 damage to every creature on field.

Zanzarino
5000|5000
Ability: Zanzarino: Automatically win and get opponent's account and all their cards and electrum.

Bieber should be a 0|1.

Beiber should be -29485754647484|0, and his effect should be
"Obsessively high pitched noise, passive, as long as Justin Bieber does not get into puberty, destroy every monster on the field

[MisterMello]

Rick Astley | Rick Astley

  : Sing

Your opponent's computer is spammed with a Bieber/Astley duet. Forever.

[kitty45]

Cat l EPIC CAT


Cost 10000000000  qunta

spam your opponent's computer with  my picture and it takes them  100000 hours to delete them
 Spell