EtG Who's Hot Competition - Arum VS Discord - Round 5 (Jousting)

[dracomageat]

As we enter into the final round, discord is leading 2-1 but can she get the final victory she needs to win or will the competition go into sudden death?
In this round, the players will both don protection and thrust long rods into each other on horseback. That's right, they're jousting, now let's hear about their technique.

[Arum]

I sit there, on my horse, and I adjust my visor. I pat my horse and grab the lance, holding it steady.

Discord and I race at each other. I duck her jab, and turn my lance sideways, sweeping her off her horse. I slow down, turn around, and jab the lance straight through her stomach, killing her slowly via tetanus and blood loss. It's her fault that I did this, she just made me so angry... with him...

I have won.

All's fair in love and war.

Not that there's love anymore.

[Zyardran]

Spoiler for Hidden:

Steady...

Set...

Now's the time to finish this once and for all...

Adjusting my balance, I quickly stroke the smooth mane of this beautiful black steed, in which turn gives me a snort of approval. It's time to end this.

This Arum kid really is full of it isn't he? Well time to show him who's boss.
With steady hands, I quickly usher the horse forward, bringing my lance horizontal, point aiming straight for his stomach and...

In an instant, it's over. The sickening smell of blood fills the air, and I watch as the light in his eyes fades away to a dull void. I had impaled him straight through the stomach.

It has been done...

T'was fun while it lasted Arum, but i'm afraid you never stood a chance...

♥

[dracomageat]

Which one of these stories is true? Who's hot and who's a stone cold corpse?
Voting begins now!

[Timdood3]

Voting for Cord simply because in an actual joust, doing what Arum did would get him executed or imprisoned.  Jousting lances are too dull to pierce armor, and besides, the goal is not to kill your opponent, but to dismount them.

But the sheer dishonor of Arum's described actions-- turning around and attacking from behind-- violates not only the spirit of jousting, but also the actual rules.  Jousters makes orderly passes simultaneously, taking hits from the other until one falls from their horse (Usually it only takes one hit, but in the case that it doesn't, you go again).

[Solaris]

Neither of them know what actual jousting is, apparently

[JonathanCrazyJ]

Never playing a game with these two. End up with a chess piece impaled in my eye.

[Arum]

Oh, yeah, when I stab my ex-lover Discord, I flash my thong as fanservice. Enjoy.

[Basman-1453]

... get me a nice plum tree or a nice palm tree to bash my head on.

Flashing one's thong in the middle of a jousting tournament is not only a severe fan disservice, it's also dangerous as hell.

[iancudorinmarian]

Never playing a game with these two. End up with a chess piece impaled in my eye.

You'll get stabbed with bishops while they're riding the knight.