Dr. Skotadi Phobos and Dr. ACCUSO hearing your problems.

[Espithel]

But they hurt ;-;

I can't get a girlfriend because they think  I'm cheating with a harem of random stranger nymphs.
They topple my groceries over when I shop.
They trampled my pet antlion... Crackles, why...
They make watching loose women impossible.
They make playing anything impossible.
I once chained a few and sold them at some foreign auction, but then even more came!
They're endless...

[Submachine]

People are barely posting anything today, Doc. What can be done to cure their will to post again? o_o

[iDaire]

I find it whenever I want to talk to a girl, a tree always gets in my way somehow.
What do I do?

[Drake_XIV]

Who am I? Why am I here? And why are you bent over in front of me with a paddle in my hand?

[TheAccuso]

Who am I? Why am I here? And why are you bent over in front of me with a paddle in my hand?

The real question is why don't you share with the doctor? <3

[TribalTrouble]

I have a problem. I have to go to a location without wifi and I also want to participate in a tournament while I'm there… with no wifi. Is there a way to remedy this problem?

[CrockettRocket]

Buy internet for the entire continent!

[caboose]

Help!please! The EVIL Stone called Steve has threatened to ruin me I mean my friend's Tax Evasion Consultation company by tipping the IRS that it's a front for counterfeit pure-breed horse heads used in movies for a discount, unless we abide with his{?{her?{It's?} demand to run two back alley doctors out of business! So please, help me my friend find these quacks! That, or find an Eternity's worth of albino Nutella.    

[TribalTrouble]

I just bought a computer from Asus and they won't honor the free 1 hour warranty they said they would give me. I gave them my information to get the computer registered for the warranty and they said no can do. I did research and found that while they make great computers(Manufacture apple's too!) their customer service is actually just a marketing firm trying to make more money. What do I do?

[CrockettRocket]

Go up higher. If you went to the company of the business, go to the mayor or governor.

[dawn to dusk]

Dear doctors

my cock bludgeoned me to death in 6 turns. it may be quite hard to undo this and i realise that death is very serious... so what should i do?

d2d

I should probably justify this by saying I got cockatrice from oracle and was beaten in 6 turns by the deck I made from it

[Skotadi Phobos]

Dear doctors

my cock bludgeoned me to death in 6 turns. it may be quite hard to undo this and i realise that death is very serious... so what should i do?

d2d

I can do nothing for you, I don't think I'll ever be able to do anything again after reading that.