The man named Jeremiah the Belligerent ate a banana shaped like Don, which tasted bad because it was actually a fish. When he realized that the bannana had tricked him he decided to throw sandals at it. The next day he tickled a heel drawn into the sand. It came alive and attacked Jeremiah with its noodley and completely unreliable leather whip. Jeremiah proceeded to thrust vulgarly at it. "Surrender!" Jeremiah shouted. He shall not be made fun of on this day. He felt bitter at the woman who sold him the leather whip enchanted with fire magic. She was weirdly-shaped with a large pimple and apparently cherished her pimple over Jeremiah's life. Feeling distraught about his life, he ate his inner fear. Doing this, he died. His body began to grow until it became furry, shifting into a horny squirrel. With bat wings. Edward the vampire blows. Squirrel Jeremiah was at last the winner tonight!
Next morning he realized he was back to normal. Phew! Then cornucopias started falling from stained glass sky. Jeremiah licked one and it tasted like chicken. Yet he had seventeen chickens in his pants, but he never noticed the dark guy under the park bench who was hiding from giant tarantulas.
Jeremiah tried to summon the souls of the turantulas to save the fabrics of his home dimension. But he didn't realize that the dark ones had arrived.
"Kneel!" They declared, "For we are the omniscient bearers of the realms of ages past."
"You will die unless you journey to the otherworld. Take this man to be your page. He shall be made king but only if you escort him through the depths of... this cave!" The man motioned towards the unusually large cave behind him. He withdrew and the dark