Corrupt A Wish 4.0

[FlareGlutox]

Granted, and you also gain the normally impossible ability to lick your elbow with your tongue. Wait, no! Don't try it out! It will hurt y... too late

I wish for my burning book to be wrapped as a gift (with fireproof gift wrap paper) and sent to some nasty person I don't know personally.

[Laxadarap]

Granted, but the person you sent it to moved and it was returned.  You open it by mistake.

I wish that I had more moneeyz

[Drake_XIV]

Granted.  You now have a warehouse full of Monopoly money.

I wish I had the ability to regrow detached limbs.

[Olevar]

Granted, every time you use this ability, U have to kill a newborn baby.

I wish for a building named after Chuck Norris.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted, but it's a small hut made out of the corpses of you and your family members.

I wish I'd get some response from the colleges I applied to, even if I didn't get accepted.

[Cheesy111]

Granted, they respond saying that they've lost your application and will need another month longer than expected to process it.
I wish that I felt less sick.

[kimham8a]

granted, you die.

I wish i could control time.

[zhangvict]

Granted, you have the ability to move forward in time by 1 second. This ability is automatically used every second.

I wish for a mountain of potato chips

[kimham8a]

Granted, it's in your stomach.

I wish I had a book.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted.  You now have a copy of the entire Twilight series.

I wish I had a decent mic.

[zhangvict]

granted, but you hit yourself on the head and lose your musical skills

I wish to not care about this wish and its corruption

[kimham8a]

Granted, you are now incapable of caring for anything.

I wish I to be OP.

Comment: I find this a lot more interesting than the Vending Machine 5.0