Corrupt A Wish 4.0

[regen2k9]

Granted.  You have glasses with Xs on the lenses that destroy/raze your eyes when you look through them.

I wish I had scale replicas of all the Mario Kart carts.

[Aves]

Granted. They're so small that you don't know they exist, and crush them by breathing.
I wish that the oracle would grant everybody nymphs tomorrow.

[mesaprotector]

Granted, the oracle gives everybody 6 of each nymph. Except you, you get a single nymph queen.

I wish to be happy.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted, but that moment of happiness lasts only one second.  The next 23 hours, 59 minutes, and 59 seconds are filled with what you would later describe as a living hell.

I wish I would stop forgetting my keys.

[regen2k9]

Granted, now every second of the day, you can't stop thinking about your keys and where they are at any given moment.

I wish that the next person who posted in this thread writes their wish in the form of a rhyme or lyric.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted, but I forgot the second line.

I wish people had manners...

[regen2k9]

Granted, people have manners, just not good ones 

I wish I could turn invisible by snapping my fingers.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted, but you can not return to a visible state.

I wish I had a car.

[mesaprotector]

Granted, you have an '86 Yugo.

I wish I were in terrible pain.

[regen2k9]

Granted, listen to this:

&ob=av2e

I wish for Melanie Iglesias.

[FlareGlutox]

Granted, she allready exists, so you gain nothing.

I wish for the ability to let everybody do what I want them to, while they are thinking that they decided what to do on their own.

[regen2k9]

Granted, but I decided to grant this wish myself...I think...

I wish my own personal theme song played whenever I walked into a crowded room.