Corrupt A Wish 4.0

[regen2k9]

Granted, you have an infinite supply of batteries for your phone, but they're all dead 

I wish I could teleport to and from the supermarket at will.

[Annele]

Granted, you teleport in the middle of the night and get hanged for stealing.

I wish to be 3cm taller.

[whatifidogetcaught?]

Granted, you snap your blood vessels.

I wish to be a skilled marksman.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted.  But your accuracy is flawless within 1 mm.

I wish I had a crossbow.

[Annele]

Granted. The bow is so angry it runs away 

I wish to be able to draw properly.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted, but you don't know what Properly looks like.

I wish to be stabbed through the heart.

[Dart]

Granted.

I wish somebody would revive drake.

[Annele]

Granted.  I revived and killed him again.

I wish for chocolate.

[Drake_XIV]

Granted, you are now diabetic.

I wish for humour.

[regen2k9]

Granted.  You get "Good Humour" ice cream!

I wish for ice cream too.

[zhangvict]

Granted, its tomato and chocolate flavored with olive oil, vanilla and mustard.

I wish for high quality mouse.

[Vendanna]

Granted, now you have a real mouse with good health and well mannered that eats cheese but is not useable for PC uses.

I wish to see a battle between two legionary ants nests.