Corrupt A Wish 3.0

[Aves]

Granted. It's always night, somewhere on the planet. You can sleep whenever you want during night, but it might not be a good idea to sleep during certain hours...
I wish I could insert stuff here.

[mildlyfrightenedboy]

Granted, but you accidentally quote instead of modifying, then do it again when you try to post an apology, racking up three posts.

I wish for a squirrel, and I want it now, daddy.

[991woot119]

you get the squirrel but it has rabies
I want it to stop raining for a week then start raining again (after the week ended)

[yee]

Granted, you get one week long snowstorm and after a week the rain melts the snow and you get flooded.

I wish for a happy ending.

Granted. But now the only speech that you can muster is swearing in Finnish. The army of Finland kills you.

Perkele! (I allready know how to swear in Finnish)

[rowcla]

Granted but its a not a happy one for you
I wish to know what would happen if you put phyrexian oil on eldrazi

[artimies7]

Granted. You know that all animated ponies die.

I wish that Valve would put endings on their Portal games.

Granted. But now the only speech that you can muster is swearing in Finnish. The army of Finland kills you.

Perkele! (I allready know how to swear in Finnish)

But now the Finnish people kill you.

[einherjar145]

Granted,but it got warped by a Portal Gun to God knows where!

I wish for a wish which requires u to quote exactly one wish from page 52 and say it without changing anything about it.

[Aves]

Okay. In an alternate universe, I have wished that 'u', whoever that is, will quote (place of quotation not specified) exactly one wish  from page 52 (topic not specified) and say it (the quote) without changing anything about it.

I wish for the next ten wishes to be grammatically sound.
(edit: removed English.).

[yee]

Granted, aga see ei tähenda, et sa sellest aru saad.
(Wrning! Google translates it littlebit wrongly.)

I wish for a pet dragon.

[sbluen]

Granted, but the dragon tries to sleep on the roof of your house, collapsing it.

I wish the Earth revolved around a binary star system.

[artimies7]

Granted. The heat kills us all.

I wish that the Earth didn't revolve around a binary star system, so that we wouldn't all die.

[Aves]

Granted. We all die anyway.
I wish for a team victory in War#4.