Hi. I'm the Master of Water, and I approve of this card.
This card is the bomb. It fought in World War II, saved a busload of nuns in Chile, and runs the world's only legitimate hedge fund that appreciates at 12%. I want to have this card's baby, and so does every member of the Pussycat Dolls. This card cures cancer in small children and dementia in the elderly. It can hurl tennis rackets at small moving animals with remarkable accuracy, and it firms and tightens your abs without you doing any exercise.
This card holds the number one video on MTV, the World Wrestling Entertainment's Hardcore Belt, and my heart in it's hands. Jesus walked on this card, and multiplied it for the hungry masses. Buddha sat under this card. Mohammed was defeated in single combat by this card.
This card is love.
I'm the Master of Water, and I'd like to thank you for listening to this message.