Brawl #6 - Round 1 - Voting

[dawn to dusk]

Pyrocloaks: I don't understand how you drinking a potion makes your weapons ignore the dragons armour.

"For the consumable version, replace Liquid Adhesive with Vitamin B12 and ignore the requirement of a weapon"
"When ready, coat the metal part of the weapon with the non-consumable version (or the tip of the arrows if using a bow) or drink the consumable version to vastly increase stamina."
"it is suggested you use both versions for maximum effectiveness"
"drinkable"
"drinkable"
"non-consumable"

Not entirely sure how to make it more obvious that there are 2 renditions of the same potion, used for different effects

[theelkspeaks]

Royalty – I considered the audio version not to be part of the task, and I made my decision without listening to it.  TG had by far the strongest performance of the teams on this task, with a very well written speech with several excellent turns of phrase.  They will receive a clear 5 points.  The other three speeches were fairly similar in quality, though I think that both S7 and PC edge ahead of FROGS.  I feel that S7’s speech was overly referential to the names of the other teams in the event, which caused the content to feel slightly more forced than clever.  As a result, I will give PC 3 points and S7 2 points.
(Scores: TG – 5, PC – 3, S7 – 2)
Bard – Again, TG has a very high quality result, but the font causes the readability to suffer a little bit, which is enough to bump them down to only 4 points instead of 5.  The periods on lines between the words look jarring, even though I know what FROGS was going for, but it hurts the image enough to lower their score to 1 point.  S7 and PC are similar in quality, but S7’s image looks slightly cleaner visually, so I’ll give them the 3 and PC the 2.
(Scores: TG – 4, S7 – 3, PC – 2, FROGS – 1)
Crusader – I really like all four of the entries here, and I can’t avoid giving points to any of them.  FROGS is slightly ahead due to their excellent explanation and most original deck, and TG gets a boost for successfully demonstrating their deck’s performance.
(Scores: FROGS – 3, TG – 3, PC – 2, S7 – 2)
Enchanter – PC have a great explanation and a very cool card. Easy 5/5 there, the remainder of the points will be the tricky part.  TG have a cool interaction with the card targeting itself to deal 1 damage all around, but ultimately that design isn’t quite strong enough for more than 1 point. S7’s card has a cool concept, but fall a little short of where I’d like to see the explanation by leaving the delay mechanic unexplained.  They earn 3 points. FROGS have a card that feels out-of-element in life (life/air), as life generally doesn’t get direct damage like that, and it doesn’t really make sense here.  If the card were simply air, it would likely fare better, but as-is, I can’t give it more than 1 point.
(Scores: PC – 5, S7 – 3, FROGS – 1, TG – 1)
Wizard/Scribe combo – I will divide 20 points for the combined task, and not separate out the component parts. S7’s task, while interesting in concept, just doesn’t quite get there.  TG and PC both have excellent stories and interesting rituals, though I think the PC’s ritual isn’t quite as good as TG’s.  FROGS will get some points for writing well, but overall, the less-original and less-interesting writeup earn them a lower score.
(Scores: TG – 10, PC – 8, FROGS – 2)
Totals: TG – 23, PC – 20, S7 – 10, FROGS - 7

[CleanOnion]

My votes for R1. I'll update this as I review each submission. I will not be publicising my voints.

Bear in mind that as I came up with many of the tasks, I may have a different set of expectations to everyone else.

Spoiler for Royalty:

S7: A few grammatical errors. Enjoyed the Asterix reference.
Overall, a strong submission, and I liked how the theme was to prevent the others from winning rather than to win outright. However, it felt humble with barely a trace of the narcissism I was looking for.

PC: Again, very humble, more expressly than the previous submission. However, while ji412jo focused on explaining and reassuring, Discord opted to distract her people. With food. Good choice.

TTG: I opted to listen to JCJ's speech. Immediately, the music in the background betrayed that sense of narcissism, but it was JonathanCrazyJ's rather than than that of the Emperor of the Frostkracken Empire - particularly the twelve seconds at the end to allow the music to fade out. Having said that, the narration was very skillful. It was interesting to hear another's pronunciation of Aurdinas. Focusing on the content itself... the words were powerful, thematic, and closely tied to the ocean. Powerful stuff.

FROGS: A true politician's speech - very froglike. This submission was full of self-praise, often masked behind a layer of charity. While the other Royals seemed to genuinely care for their people above themselves, mathman101 used that compassion for others to hide real greed. Though not obvious, this was the narcissism I was looking for and as such I awarded this submission the most voints.

Spoiler for Bard:

I should make it clear that for this task I was looking for a propaganda poster to encourage people from your country to sign up to fight the dragon. Think WW2 propaganda posters.

S7: This submission was not at all what I was expecting, and seemed to apply to applicants to Brawl rather than the people of Ombrella. Even in that context the poster asked "Are you ready?" without at all explaining what viewers should be ready for. The neckless people in the foreground and their odd limb positions seemed to bear no relevance to anything. I'm unsure if the blue haired (presumably) woman was supposed to be ji412jo. The note in the bottom right corner was the final straw on the donkey's back.

FROGS: Nice and simple, and with the exception of the text itself seemed hand drawn. While effective, this made it look unprofessional - not something the ruler of the country would want to plaster everywhere. The context of the poster seemed to be for political rebellion rather than to go and fight a dragon.

TTG: Looked like the sort of thing I'd expect to see on the wall of a tavern or a message post. Presentation was effective and very well done. This was essentially exactly what I was expecting to see and I'd struggle not to award this one the most voints. But wouldn't the paper get wet?

PC: This poster offered very little context, and seemed to be more like a web ad or a painting or something than a poster. However, the artwork was very well done and created a rather impressive scene in typical DoctorC style. I rather liked this one.

Spoiler for Crusader:

FROGS: A simple almost-monolife deck, very thematic to the team. The description and explanations seemed a little forced but a decent submission nonetheless.

S7: Six crusaders. Two of whom had shields that aren't secret enough. Animate Weapon would imply that they are not, in fact, standing still.

PC: I didn't expect to see a gravity themed deck. While the explanation for the deck itself was good, there was very little to relate it to the team.

TTG: Of course, TTG's submission is almost as long as all the others combined. With plenty of explanation for both its thematic relevance and its proficiency as a deck, this was the winner.

Spoiler for Enchanter:

PC: I'll have to wait until this round's Royalty task to see the landscape of Zyarhelm and see if a Mammoth would fit in it. In the meantime, I very much enjoyed the introductory story. However, a few of the people in the crowd already seem to know what a dragon is and it would probably be better to expand on this. I'll have to assume mammoths are known for causing a lot of disasters. The card itself seemed to powerful; soft CC on a stick. Excuse me if I get my soft and hard CC mixed up.

FROGS: Initially, I thought this was going to be a play on how a hawk, though mostly harmless, would be very dangerous to a frog. Do hawks kill frogs? Apparently not, as the description implies. Although an amphibian community may have very little clue of what kind of critters exist in the outside world, the hawk seemed a bit of a stretch. Much like Pyrocloaks, the CC on a stick seemed unbalanced.

S7: Round 3 of the World Championship of CC On A Stick, but this one had enough downsides that it seemed a lot more balanced. An adder is a lizard and this one spits fire - very similar to a dragon.

TTG: Round 4! This card was well-rounded - I'd like to see it in-game. Description was apt. This creature seemed almost too apt for comparison to a dragon, both realistically and thematically. I would have to commend the person who came up with it for their imagination.

I awarded equal voints to both S7 and TTG.

Spoiler for Wizard and Scribe:

S7: The magical procedure seemed to basic and easy to perform - doesn't seem like you need a trained wizard to accomplish it. The description clarified this, it's the effect of the Dusk Mantle in the style of the tablet from Night At The Museum. I quite liked this twist on my expectations.

TTG: Is "(must be aquatic)" a note to the reader of the document or a note to the writer of the submission? Either way, the lore was enjoyable and full of sass. I was pleased to see that "(must be aquatic)" was in fact intentional, and the book page was well done however rather difficult to read in places. It was also made of paper, which I thought was being transcribed from rather than onto. Overall, a good quality submission.

PC: This submission seemed a little tongue-in-cheek at first, especially the Vitamin B12. However, this was not reflected in the rest of the submission and seemed out of place. However, I liked the twist - that Demise was actually a failure, in a way.

FROGS: I was told that ARTHANASIOS would produce long submissions, and I thought I would be ready for a big wall of text. Apparently not! However, about half of the work was direct plagiarism and, while noted, the note was far too small. As I read the rest I found myself doubting how much of it was original work. I see no justification in awarding any voints.

I awarded equal points to Pyrocloaks and TTG. Points were split equally between both components.

[JonathanCrazyJ]

Immediately, the music in the background betrayed that sense of narcissism, but it was JonathanCrazyJ's rather than than that of the Emperor of the Frostkracken Empire

Rofl, awesome

[Aves]

It was also made of paper, which I thought was being transcribed from rather than onto.

It is both! Or if you're a purist, paper is not parchment. Specifically, it is being transcribed from an inferior not-waterproof medium onto enchanted, waterproof parchment! That detail is mentioned in the same paragraph, I think.

[Hyroen]

Feedback on the tasks below. I will take questions, though I will not change the points given.

Voint allocation will not be discussed. I will do my best to stick to a voint scheme of 4-3-2-1. Unless otherwise mentioned, this is the voint scheme used.

Spoiler for Royalty:

Task: You are leaving your country to do battle with the Dragon. Write a farewell speech to your people! Make sure to remind them how important and royal you are.
Specifically, I was looking for an almost narcissistic tone, while at the same time not allowing the royalty to come across as humble or self-sacrificing. This specifically undermines the task's request to remind your people how important and royal you are. I did however take into consideration the eloquence, passion and flow of the speech hearing it as if I were one of your people.

TG - The task asks for a written farewell speech to your people, so I do think the audio is extra fluff. Beautifully spoken, beautifully orchestrated fluff, but fluff nonetheless. Impacting eloquence and imagery served this speech well, but I would've liked to see less humility. I did like the crescendo in passion throughout the speech and think it was specifically designed this way to be coordinated with the background music. I would've liked to see you remind your people who you are and why you are their royalty as opposed to bringing yourself down to their level. One of the stronger speeches overall, primarily because most royalty decided to go down a humble road.

Fr - Short and to the point. Kudos to one of the more self-serving speeches. There were opportunities missed however. Instead of 'look at the marvelous habitats I have worked hard to build,' it could've been something along the lines of 'look at the marvelous habitats you have all worked hard to build for me. Would you let all your hard work go to waste?' Lacked a bit of the eloquence, imagery and passion I would expect from a speech by royalty, though I felt like this submission did the best at reminding how important and royal you are. This was significant.

P - This speech came across as the most feeble and spineless. Allowing your people to have free rein on their decisions and coming across as humble leaders did you no service. The stereotypical charismatic leader tends to make themselves come across as humble and part of the people, though this doesn't help remind anyone how important and royal you are. It's important to double and triple check what the task asks of you. Furthermore, this did not inspire me to move a muscle, and would've expected much more passion from a Brawl Team priding itself as the firey Pyrocloaks.

S7 - Personally, I found this speech to start off as somewhat meek though slightly self-serving, which I did like. It sounded like you were telling your people about something that has to get done before others get to it, and didn't seem too motivating or motivated. I did however enjoy, that true to the elemental theme of the Brawl Team, the tone was overall hidden, almost as if whispered and incorporated secrecy and shadows, though I do believe that this still could've been done in a rallying and much more cathartic way.

Spoiler for Bard:

Task: Design a propaganda poster to encourage your people to sign up to help take down the Dragon!
Specifically, I was looking for a poster that is designed and created by the team that would primarily make me want to take down the Dragon!

TG - Well conceived and one of the stronger submissions overall. Would've preferred something original despite that not being specifically mentioned in the task, but bonus points would've certainly been given. Definitely one of the cleaner submissions, though I do think it was because of the pre-made images. The message is on point and the design is very well made though.

Fr - Seems entirely incomplete. I know what F.R.O.G.S. stands for but at the same time if I just see that, I have no idea what I'm joining or for what reason. Does seem like a reworked image done on Paint, which is perfectly fine, but it seems as though there were plans for a background and it was left off half way. Missed the mark for what the task asked for, primarily because the message is not clear that townspeople can join to help take down the Dragon. If this is all I had seen I might consider joining but I have no idea why or what incentives there are. On the weaker end, if not the weakest submission.

P - Seems to be original work and a clean, finished project. Enjoying the dimensions and perspective of everything in the image, though I would've liked to see a bit more dazzle in the image, fire perhaps? Especially from Pyrocloaks. I'm not sure if the slightly off centre text in the second line is intentional. Might've preferred to see it centered or at the very least very intentionally off centre. Furthermore, there definitely should be punctuation! An exclamation point perhaps? Major bonus points for this being original work however. Overall one of the stronger submissions if not the strongest. Kudos.

S7 - Though I like the art style, the contrast of the font is very minimal and for some reason all the team is standing around the Dragon. Also seems a little too oddly self-referential, would your people know what Brawl #6 is? That is what your townsfolks are seeing. I would've liked to see a little more antagonistic positioning against the Dragon and more salient font, possibly also rewards around the Dragon (treasure chests, jewelry for colour, gold, silver, gems, etc.) Not the weakest submission but certainly had room for improvement.

Spoiler for Crusader:

Task: Create a deck that represents your country's army gathered for the dragon slaying quest!
Specifically, I would like to see an effective deck on its own right that is attuned elementally to a team's theme. However, what's most important for me is that the deck seem like it's specifically for taking down a dragon.

TG - I understand that the Brawl team is represented, and there is definitely an elemental affinity, which I'm liking, I just don't see the deck as being catered for use against a Dragon. I would've preferred to see a streamlining of the thematically devastating effects that Water can accomplish through the icy bolts to be lobbed from the adept hands of archmages in your army, through the stripping of water from the air and all nearby beings, and of course, through the crashing waves of a flooded field. Through the use of a heavy CC deck, I feel like the deck would've seemed elementally thematic while at the same time being highly effective for plot purposes. As it is now, it seems a bit lost in terms of purpose and at best, a muddied beatstick of a deck.

Fr - This submission suffered from many of the same weaknesses as the submission by The Tentacle's Grip, but to a greater extent. The Brawl Team representation I appreciated, but the deck just seems lost in terms of purpose and by no stretch of the imagination seems like the deck of choice for defeating a great beast such as a Dragon. Having said that, even the team representation was partly a weakness as there were many cards in the deck that just don't seem to work for it in the least bit. Life as an element struggles with creature control, and it's evident in the cards at its disposal, however, you can always get creative! I would've loved to see something like a deck symbolizing a rain of frogs overpowering a Dragon, including Giant Frogs, Mitosis, Druidic Staves and possibly some Empathic Bonds. This deck would've not only symbolized the tactics of the army of the F.R.O.G.S. but also the fury of Life, rising up to any challenge through teamwork and sheer numbers.

P - By far one of my favourite submissions. Though at this point I'm uncertain if there is an elemental theme to the Pyrocloaks or not. I can specifically see this deck being used against mighty soaring, fire-breathing beasts, and for some reason it also makes me think of the French from Monty Python, catapulting random things. A fine balance between an effective deck for the game and a deck designed for the purposes of plot. Though if the elemental theme of the Pyrocloaks is not by this point, you may very well want to consider it.

S7 - I loved the simplicity of the deck, in the sense that it was focused, elementally thematic and suited well for taking down a dragon. However, I could only imagine that though arrows might seem powerful, they might seem more of a nuisance to a Dragon that strikes fear into the hearts across the land. As such, considering you are only using arrows (as far as the deck indicates and excluding any shadow spell), your army very well may be in for a painful and scorching end once the enchantment of your cloaks end. Certainly one of the stronger submissions, though I fear that arrows might not be as strong as is needed for a beast of such magnitude. (Despite the fact that most unupgraded Dragons have 5-6 HP, lol)

Spoiler for Enchanter:

Task: Many of your countrymen have never seen a dragon. Make a card depicting a creature that is common in your country, that you could use to explain what a dragon is like.

I should firstly say I'm holding Enchanter tasks to a much higher standard and will analyze them with more refined scrutiny than other tasks. As a Card Curator I am specifically looking for card designs that would make sense for the task and for inclusion in EtG.

Specifically, for this task, I'm looking for elemental affinity, elegant design, and a creature which is feared but at the same time part of the country and can be used to explain what a dragon is like.

TG - There is no doubt in my mind that a Leviathan is archetypal. It is used across RPGs and there are likely few, who, upon hearing the name, can't already imagine a long, scaled, aquatic serpent-like thing of sorts. So it certainly goes without saying that I appreciated the archetypal nature of the creature chosen. Having said that, I don't appreciate the rarity that I associate with the Leviathan. I can't quite imagine the Leviathan as being a common creature across the land. There is a reason that people call the Leviathan, -the- Leviathan as opposed to a Leviathan. As far as I'm aware, it's a specific name for a rare, if not singular, creature. Due to this I can't imagine too many townsfolks being aware of what a Leviathan is to begin with and those that have may not have seen one! This undermines the ability to be able to use the Leviathan to compare it to a Dragon. Naturally, we can say that the Leviathan is a common creature across the land (or sea) and it's a household name, however, it was not a path that had to be taken. In terms of design, I'm intrigued by the mechanic and appreciate that the skill is within Light, however I wonder whether it is fitting for a Leviathan to use. Regarding the lore, I appreciated that it was included, however the terminology seemed a bit forced and reductive. I would've appreciated a bit more metaphor and allusion as opposed to directly describing what the creature skill does. Certainly one of the stronger submissions overall.

Fr - Simply the weakest submission. Sometimes a simple design is a good thing, in this case it wasn't. Considering the elemental Life theme, there was a lot of versatility in terms of which creature could be selected to describe a Dragon. The choice was a Hawk? Furthermore, the choice was a Hawk that can claw at things? Why is this creature in Life? Why is this mechanic suited for Life's arsenal? I appreciated the conversation comparing the Hawk to the Dragon at the end, but not even mentioning the fact that the image had to be taken down, the overall design was a simply lacklustre, seemingly last minute creature which if added to EtG, would do nothing but add yet another creature of pointless design to an element that can't afford one.

P - Certainly one of the strongest submissions. Simplicity and elegance in design was appreciated, however the mechanic seems a little off the mark, much moreso considering the airborne mechanic in the game. What flying dragon can be trampled if it can simply fly higher? I do also question why this mechanic would be in Earth. I would've perhaps prefered to see a touch more health on something as resilient as a Mammoth. Skyrim would definitely give more perspective. Overall one of the strongest and cleanest submissions which can be used effectively to describe at the least the size of a Dragon. Furthermore, the conversation written telling of the description of the Dragon using the Mammoth as an example was the cherry on top. Though once again, I'm confused as to whether I was supposed to see something within the arsenal of Fire? Gravity? Is there any elemental affinity in the Pyrocloaks?

S7 - Simply from the name alone I can't imagine the size of the creature, and if it's more snakelike I imagine that the biggest similarity is that it might spit fire, but possibly as well or as far as I can rap (for the record, that's not very much). I would say the creature is a decent example that can be used to explain what a Dragon is like, but I struggle to understand why this mechanic is in Darkness or even in Fire. The card adds little to the arsenal of Darkness and the mechanic itself is a little convoluted. Furthermore, I would've preferred to see more archetypal creatures that could still be interpreted within the element and could have still been excellent examples for comparison to a Dragon. I did, however, appreciate that a nocturnal creature was chosen for this task. Not the worst submission but there was certainly room for improvement.

Spoiler for Wizard & Scribe:

Task:
Scribe: Write the instructions for a secret magical procedure (eg a spell, ritual, potion recipe) that will grant you an advantage in the ensuing quest!
Wizard: Tell us the story of how you were able to perform this procedure! If it's a potion recipe, where did you find the ingredients? If it's a spell, where did you learn it?

Specifically, and more generally in written tasks, I'm looking to be captivated by the eloquence and imagery. Of course, the submission has to fulfill the task requirements and lastly I always appreciate a bit of elemental affinity, whether that mean through the tone or the imagery.

TG - This submission definitely takes the cake for length and amount, but quality certainly trumps quantity. I was confused by the overwhelming onslaught of material within this submission and the hectic presentation of it all. The image didn't help and if anything took a certain something away from the overall presentation as the different fonts, colours and content did the image no service. Also, considering the elemental theme of Water, the best spell effect that we could come up with was a gold-sniffing shark that can swim on land? I personally would've gone back to the drawing board. I definitely appreciated the almost pirate-magicks vibe I was getting from the submission, but though the spell was certainly inspired, it was also a highly off-colour and questionable choice considering the entire realm of possibilities that the realm of Water presents.

Fr - Inspiration always risks the possibility of too much similarity. In this case I don't think the similarity was overwhelming because the work itself does seem to be original, but the inspiration was so much so that it seemed as though little thought went into making the submission a thought truly your own. Slight mistakes here and there in the story also did the overall submission no justice. Also, I would've preferred to have seen the story without any author names either, as the anonymity reduces bias and helps Voters (whether on the Voting Panel or not) focus more on the quality of the submission than on risking offending or hurting forum member X. The second side of the same coin is that through anonymity all feedback given isn't personal, because voters and feedback given can't focus on anyone or anything but the work up for scrutiny. I did appreciate the attempt to try to 'tame' a Dragon as opposed to killing it in, however, as it appropriately channeled Life elemental affinity and it was mainly because of this that I did not consider this submission the weakest of the 4.

P - Excellent execution on both procedure and story. Finished products while also clearly being for the task at hand. Furthermore, because of the story, it's clear (or at least assumed) that Zyarhelm has learned from their mistakes and will be taking Dragon's Demise with them but using slightly different tactics. I enjoyed the imagery in the ingredients chosen for the recipe as well as the beautifully written somber tone of the Wizard recounting the tale. One of the stronger, if not the strongest submission.

S7 - By far one of the coolest spells, major voints were won simply for having an awesome effect. However, I would've appreciated more of a finished written project and a more elaborate ritual in order for the enchantment to come into effect. Despite the fact that the procedure seemed explained, the effect impressed me, but the presentation? Not as much. Having said that, I appreciated the elemental affinity and overall, it was definitely one of the stronger submissions.

All feedback up.

[JonathanCrazyJ]

I did like the crescendo in passion throughout the speech and think it was specifically designed this way to be coordinated with the background music.

Amazingly I found the music after recording the speech. Couldn't believe how well it fitted lol.

[Fippe94]

So here are my thoughts on the submissions:
(Note that the order I mention the teams in is not neccessarily their ranking in how well I liked them)
I have chosen to not share my exact voint allocation, but I will tell you who I give most.

Royalty
I think the music in TTG's speech fit very well, but I will judge it based on content only. Even so, I feel like it was the best of the speeches. It had nice structure and flow- The many water-themed phrases was a nice touch too. Pyrocloaks felt a bit weak with phrases such as "feel free to sign up", but otherwise I liked it. I liked how FROGS speech really try to convince the listeners to go take gold ("and our children's children"), and you could really imagine the crowd cheering at the end of the speech. S7 had some references to another task and to past events, which was cool but almost felt a bit tacked on at times.
Winner: TTG

Bard
TTG gets bonus points for being the only one that really looked like an actual sign up poster, but the one I like most here is Pyrocloaks one. Well made art that best captures the "coolness" of fighting a dragon, even though it does not commletely feels like a sign up poster. FRGOS's poster feels a bit empty. The frog was nice of course, but the rest of the poster just seems boring. As for S7's poster I don't really like it as a poster for fighting a dragon. With the "Are you ready?" and main person looking like she is dancing it looks almost more like a movie poster of some kind.
Winner: Pyrocloaks

Crusader
While its description was lacking, I for some reason really like S7's simple idea of stealthy shadowy archers to take down the dragon. TTG's presentation on the other hand felt almost a bit much, and with so much stuff I would have like to see some actual deck strategy discussion, instead of only lore. Lore is cool, yes, but his felt a bit overboard to me, since it lacked any kind of strategy text. It is a deck builder task after all. FROGS's deck feels more of a specilized team than an army (even if you have horned frogs too), which I didn't really like. TTG also falls into this, but not as much since they have 2 types of soldiers and a weapon and a shield to balance it up a bit more. Pyrocloaks is the only team that includes a strategy text, which is a plus for me. The card-by-card breakdown also includes some some un parts ("Also able to launch 90kg over 300 metres with a counterweight."), which made me really like it.
Winner: S7 and Pyrocloaks

Enchanter
I liked all the card ideas, and it was fun to see how every team had its own idea on what to compare a dragon with. Every card had some form of cc built in, but of those, i like S7's idea the most. An interesting take on CC on a stick and the delay and the fact that it is a duo cost should keep it from being too strong. Pyrocloak's idea seems farthest away from a dragon at first glance, but I think it's a creative move to link the sheer destruction of a dragon to another creature entirely. Andthe ability might looks a bit boring compared to the others, but it really has a sense of immense power. FROGS card feels a bit lackluster, although I can see what you were going for here. The ability is not super-creative, and I feel like Air already have plenty cc capabilities. and the ability does as well. As for TTG's card, I do like Leviathan lore-wise, it's a good idea. The unupped looks a bit weak though, and it's ability aren't as great as it first seems since it only triggers on abilities and it affects your own creature as well. So if you are using it offensively you can't have too many other creatures, and a 4/4 is pretty bad for attacking. The upped one gains +3/+3 compared to the unupped one which is pretty huge, and looks much better to actually use.
Winner: S7

Combo: Wizard
FROGS submission was a bit too much copypaste for my taste and even if parts were changed much of the instructions still feel taken from a RPG rulebook (which it is) instead of an actual "real-life" ritual. TTG' ritual was nicely presented in the book form, but I question the need for different colors for each added note. Maybe one or two colors would be enough? I liked the humor in the notes and the instructions. S7's shadow manipulation is cool, but the description is a bit unlcear. Is the wielder harmed from wounds from all shadowshe controls, or only his own? The control of your own shadow feels very limited if you have to have your hand on all the time. Still an interesting idea, I like it. Pyrocloak's seems pretty standard "strength potion", but the two versions of the substance was a bit confusing. You describe what the weapon-version does at the start of the text, but the drinkable version isn't explained until the very end, even if it is mentioned before.
Winner: TTG

Combo: Scribe
S7's is very short and doesn't tell a lot. What exactly is the Dusk Mantle? A magical artifact that gives power to the whole country? Should have been explained more. It seems a bit weird that it happened at a bar brawl. Only the people at the bar were there to gain shadow control? This should have been explanded on more, since the story is very short as it is. Again I appreciate the humor in TTG's submission. I particularly liked the description of the time it had taken to get the ritual working. (mot people don't think about liability agreements when doing a magic ritual). I liked Pyrocloak's story best. It was nice to see the progression of creating the substance from hearing tales of dragon all up to the fall of Aurdinas. FROGS story isn't bad, but it feels like the first part of a longer story, which I am not sure how it fits into the Aurdinas story. It's unclear how (or even if) you country got hold of the orb.
Winner: Pyrocloaks

[Jenkar]

but fall a little short of where I’d like to see the explanation by leaving the delay mechanic unexplained

Not to be nitpicky, but fyi, this is a mechanism of the core game (procrastination's).
I thought not explaining that we're not adding a special effect to the game would be sufficient to point out it's just the existing one, guess not

[ARTHANASIOS]

FROGS: I was told that ARTHANASIOS would produce long submissions

Keep in mind that my tl;dr submissions were not really welcomed by many, that's why I tried something new in this one (even if it felt unoriginal and copy/paste). Well, I may return to my old habits then...

[Espithel]

but fall a little short of where I’d like to see the explanation by leaving the delay mechanic unexplained

Not to be nitpicky, but fyi, this is a mechanism of the core game (procrastination's).

And basilisk blood. And SoPa. And the warden. And some permutation of the shard golem.
Silly thelkie.

[russianspy1234]

Nooo my streak of being in Brawl is broken, could have sworn it started later...  Well, I guess I'll be a voter this time around.