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Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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[Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1225673#msg1225673
« on: February 29, 2016, 03:18:40 am »
Writer Task, Week II, Brawl V

Challenge: You're in a locked room. Escape.

Submission starts below the dotted line:

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Spoiler for Choose Your Own Elements VII:
- You are in a locked room. Escape.
> look
- Please be more specific. What do you want to look at?
> room
- The walls are colored a vague shade of bagel beige and the room has twelve equal walls.
- There is a door in the western wall, an oak table against the opposite wall, and a pyramid of perfectly generic objects to the south.
- The only reason you have any idea about the direction is the crimson N splattered on the wall across from the pyramid.
- Hopefully that's red paint.
- Lastly, whirring from above. A vent cover is barely visible in the ceiling.

> look floor
- Would it kill you to use prepositions? Ugh, fine.
- The floor is tiled in the same faded fawn coloration as the walls and appears to be spotless.

> look vent
- Use 'at' and maybe I'll tell you.
> look at vent
- The vent cover is just visible by the slats which give a little bit of vision into the duct above.
- However, it has been painted for careful concealment by giving it the same shade of bleached bronze as the rest of the ceiling.

> look at pyramid
- This pyramid is precisely constructed of perfectly generic objects.
> look at objects
- Which objects?
> generic objects
- The perfectly generic objects are altogether average articles, stacked into a pyramidal shape.
- Attempting to unstack them is not recommended.

> unstack pyramid
- Are you sure?
> yes
- As you begin to uncap the pyramid, a hypercube is released.
- You're not quite sure how, but it encases you and, after a few moments of complete searing pain, you black out.
- When you awaken again, the pyramid is back in order but the room is otherwise unchanged.
- Maybe now you won't try the pyramid again.

> unstack pyramid
- I forbid it.
> unstack pyramid anyway
- The pyramid vanishes, probably to spite your insolence. Get on with the adventure.
> pout
- You pout for a while.
- ...
- Are you done yet?

> no
- ...
- How about now?

> no
- Too bad. Static crackles out of a watch on your wrist you would have noticed earlier if you weren't wasting time.
- "Testing. You there?" The voice sounds vaguely familiar...

> poke watch
- You fumble around with the buttons a bit. The voice speaks again. "Agent Crawler, please respond. If you are under duress, it has been a pleasure serving with you."
- The watch starts heating of its own accord. Between the name and this...now you remember. Junior member of special operations team Blue Depths, agent A. 'Crawler'...although your mission still escapes memory.

> ask about mission
- The voice sounds greatly relieved upon deactivating the bomb in the watch after hearing from you, and tells you as much.
- Apparently you were here to check on Darkness's plans to force hostage Aether scientists to create a four-dimensional construction and use it as a torture device. That was probably the thing that came out of the pyramid and attacked you earlier.
- Before the conversation can continue, though, the doorknob turns.

> hide with table
- Springing to action, training back in mind, you run over and flip the table to use it as cover. Probably a good idea; the guard who arrives has a dagger in hand, five more in his belt, and from what you know about Darkness...he probably knows how to aim them.
> charge him
- You reach to your own belt...and, finding yourself well-equipped with water, smirk softly. You fly out from behind the improvised barricade, raining sharp and cold with your Ice Bolts.
- Quick, what do you do next?

> get out
- Jabbing the distracted guard in the shoulder with an icicle and leaving it there, you run by through the open door. Forget the room, the mission is more important now.
- Now you're in a hallway, lined with many doors. To your right there's a T-intersection, while far to the left the corridor turns off to the left again.  Going quickly would be a good idea.

> go left
- Going to try any of the doors along the way?
> no
- The intersection has another hall of doors if you turn left, but one single door at the end of the right branch. Which way?
> right
- You approach the sole door at speed, footsteps sounding behind you. What now?
> break door
- Momentum isn't in your skillset, strictly speaking, but you ram through the door nonetheless. That's going to leave a mark...
- The next room is a small plain chamber with smooth metal walls and another door. The guard is also right behind you!

> attack guard with secret weapon
- ...it's a good thing you have a secret weapon to attack with at all.
- Summoning your Trident (and feeling the air dry a little), you spin and catch the guard's arm before the dagger finds your back.
- Pressing your opportunity, you remember your two-type training. With one hand on the metal wall, you jab your armament towards the guard. The floor shakes and half his complement of daggers go flying, including the one he was holding. He's fairly defenseless in this startled state.

> spear him
- As you're about to deliver the finishing blow, a hiss from behind catches your attention. The other door is still shut, and the noise seems to come from another vent cover you didn't quite notice in the ceiling.
- An acrid scent quickly reaches you at about the same time the guard begins coughing and retching; your stomach turns and you'd know that smell anywhere. Poison.

> go through other door
- Your head is already feeling light as you walk to the other side of the toxic chamber; whatever supplies Death pitched in here, they're pretty...potent...
- The door is opened to a maintenance area, but you're starting to have trouble seeing.
> heal quick somehow
- There's enough clarity in the noxious fog to remember that you're a Water elemental, which means you are capable of stopping poison in its tracks. Though shaky, you raise a vial to your lips, remembering the purity of the water, remembering to Purify...
- It's not immediate, but the mental haze fades and you can move again.

> look for path
- Besides the way you came in, this room doesn't seem to lead to anywhere except the vent system.
> go vent
- What, you want to complain to your liason at HQ? Unless you mean go 'in' vent, in which case, say as much.
> go in vent
- You head into the vent system. It's pretty dark in here, but at least doesn't seem dangerous. You reach an intersection. Do you want to go north (backtrack), west, east, or south?
> go west
- At the next junction in the vent maze, you may go north, east (backtrack), or south. There is a whirring echo from the south and a faint light in the north.
> north
- You're getting further in the vents, so you have to crawl.
> crawl north
- While moving forward, a loose panel gives way. You drop from the vent shaft and land in another room similar to the one in which you awoke, but no table to take cover with this time.
- You are in a locked room. Escape.
> RAAAAAAAGE
- 'RAAAAAAAGE' is not a valid command.
> QUIT
- Are you sure you want to quit? Progress will not be saved. (y/n)
> Y
« Last Edit: March 06, 2016, 10:50:38 pm by Silver Emerald »
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1225674#msg1225674
« Reply #1 on: February 29, 2016, 03:19:08 am »
Reserved for deserved and conserved references/notes.
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline kirbylover314

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1225676#msg1225676
« Reply #2 on: February 29, 2016, 03:25:29 am »
I feel like an interactive fiction based story would be nice, but not sure if that idea's too obvious.

Spoiler for example:
You find yourself in a room. There are four doors, each facing one of the cardinal directions.

>Go North.

Into the next room...

The door slams behind you. You try to open it, but it is locked.

Of course, feel free to right however you want to, it's just a suggestion.
« Last Edit: February 29, 2016, 03:27:29 am by kirbylover314 »

Offline JonathanCrazyJ

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1225738#msg1225738
« Reply #3 on: February 29, 2016, 04:41:54 pm »
Kirby's idea could work, but you'd have to make sure it's an entertaining read as well as just fulfilling the idea.

Only other idea I have currently is writing it in a spy-novel style, where a water elemental has been trapped by a darkness elemental. We would then use our creatures, spells etc in an imaginative way to escape. (squid trapping a guard, ice bolt forming an icy ladder to the ceiling vent, Abyss 'Crawler' crawling through the air vent to the operating room, purifying the drugged food that's sent to us etc)
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Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1225766#msg1225766
« Reply #4 on: February 29, 2016, 06:33:56 pm »
All right, I'll be considering this throughout the day. I have a pretty good feeling about the ending being that the 'escape' actually leads to another locked room. Something like this if we go the IF route:

Spoiler for Example:
> At this junction in the vent maze, you may go north, east (backtrack), or south. There is a whirring echo from the south and a faint light in the north.
- north
> You're in the vents, so you have to crawl.
> At this junction in the vent maze, you may go north, east (backtrack), or south. There is a whirring echo from the south and a faint light in the north.
- crawl north
> While moving forward, a loose panel gives way. You drop from the vent shaft and land in another room similar to the one in which you awoke, but no table to reach the vent with this time.
> You are in a locked room. Escape.
- RAAAAAAAGE
> 'RAAAAAAAGE' is not a valid command.
- QUIT
> Are you sure you want to quit? Progress will not be saved. (y/n)
- Y

Or we just leave it open-ended if we're not doing IF. Of course, if anyone thinks this is a pretty terrible idea, I'm open to other closing possibilities.

Also, since more information is often better, I'll record this here:

[11:54:33] ‹CleanOnion› Round 2 Writer Task : In order to secure my BM vote, I'm looking for a specific plot point. Hint hint. No I won't tell you what it is
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226140#msg1226140
« Reply #5 on: March 03, 2016, 05:31:51 pm »
I've been writing a script in that rare commodity that is free time; should be able to get a draft up after I finish fighting off this week's dual midterms in a few hours.
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226392#msg1226392
« Reply #6 on: March 05, 2016, 09:34:03 pm »
Estimated time to draft is a couple hours.
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226423#msg1226423
« Reply #7 on: March 06, 2016, 12:40:24 am »
All right, I have to go for a bit but here's the story so far. I'm not totally sure about starting with really meta and then transitioning to serious (and planning to transition back again at the end), but I think it might be a little better for immersion. Once I get back I should be able to finish in decent time.

Spoiler for Draft 0.5:
> You are in a locked room. Escape.
- look
> Please be more specific. What do you want to look at?
- room
> The walls are colored a vague shade of bagel beige and has twelve equal walls.
> There is a door in the western wall, an oak table against the opposite wall, and a pyramid of perfectly generic objects to the south.
> The only reason you have any idea about the direction is the crimson N splattered on the wall across from the pyramid.
> Hopefully that's red paint.
> Lastly, whirring from above. A vent cover is barely visible in the ceiling.
- look floor
> Would it kill you to use prepositions? Ugh, fine.
> The floor is tiled in the same faded fawn coloration as the walls and appears to be spotless.
- look vent
> Use 'at' and maybe I'll tell you.
- look at vent
> The vent cover is just visible by the slats which give a little bit of vision into the duct above.
> However, it has been painted for careful concealment by giving it the same shade of bleached bronze as the rest of the ceiling.
- look at pyramid
> This pyramid is precisely constructed of perfectly generic objects.
- look at objects
> Which objects?
- generic objects
> The perfectly generic objects are altogether average articles, stacked into a pyramidal shape.
> Attempting to unstack them is not recommended.
- unstack pyramid
> Are you sure?
- yes
> As you begin to uncap the pyramid, a hypercube is released.
> You're not quite sure how, but it encases you and, after a few moments of complete searing pain, you black out.
> When you awaken again, the pyramid is back in order but the room is otherwise unchanged.
> Maybe now you won't try the pyramid again.
- unstack pyramid
> I forbid it.
- unstack pyramid anyway
> The pyramid vanishes, probably to spite your insolence. Get on with the adventure.
- pout
> You pout for a while.
> ...
> Are you done yet?
- no
> ...
> How about now?
- no
> Too bad. Static crackles out of a watch on your wrist you would have noticed earlier if you weren't wasting time.
> "Testing. You there?" The voice sounds vaguely familiar...
- poke watch
> You fumble around with the buttons a bit. The voice speaks again. "Agent Crawler, please respond. If you are under duress, it has been a pleasure serving with you."
> The watch starts heating of its own accord. Between the name and this...now you remember. Junior member of special operations team Blue Depths, agent A. 'Crawler'...although your mission still excapes memory.
- ask about mission
> The voice sounds greatly relieved upon deactivating the bomb in the watch after hearing from you, and tells you as much.
> Apparently you were here to check on Darkness's plans to force hostage Aether scientists to create a four-dimensional construction and use it as a torture device.
> That was probably the thing that came out of the pyramid and attacked you earlier.
> Before the conversation can continue, though, the doorknob turns.
- hide with table
> Springing to action, training back in mind, you run over and flip the table to use it as cover.
> Probably a good idea; the guard who arrives has a dagger in hand, five more in his belt, and from what you know about Darkness...he probably knows how to aim them.
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline Silver EmeraldTopic starter

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226518#msg1226518
« Reply #8 on: March 06, 2016, 09:12:29 pm »
So I'm considering what format options to use. We might be able to get at something interesting with the 'glow' and 'shadow' tags (especially if the narrator's color corresponds to mood), but plain green is also easier to read. The first several lines have this formatting for example. Either way, this draft (with just green) is now the current draft.

It's been updated over time with some compression and complete formatting.

Spoiler for Choose Your Own Elements:
- You are in a locked room. Escape.
> look
- Please be more specific. What do you want to look at?
> room
- The walls are colored a vague shade of bagel beige and has twelve equal walls.
- There is a door in the western wall, an oak table against the opposite wall, and a pyramid of perfectly generic objects to the south.
- The only reason you have any idea about the direction is the crimson N splattered on the wall across from the pyramid.

- Hopefully that's red paint.
- Lastly, whirring from above. A vent cover is barely visible in the ceiling.
> look floor
- Would it kill you to use prepositions? Ugh, fine.
- The floor is tiled in the same faded fawn coloration as the walls and appears to be spotless.
> look vent
- Use 'at' and maybe I'll tell you.
> look at vent
- The vent cover is just visible by the slats which give a little bit of vision into the duct above.
- However, it has been painted for careful concealment by giving it the same shade of bleached bronze as the rest of the ceiling.

> look at pyramid
- This pyramid is precisely constructed of perfectly generic objects.
> look at objects
- Which objects?
> generic objects
- The perfectly generic objects are altogether average articles, stacked into a pyramidal shape.
- Attempting to unstack them is not recommended.
> unstack pyramid
- Are you sure?
> yes
- As you begin to uncap the pyramid, a hypercube is released.
- You're not quite sure how, but it encases you and, after a few moments of complete searing pain, you black out.
- When you awaken again, the pyramid is back in order but the room is otherwise unchanged.

- Maybe now you won't try the pyramid again.
> unstack pyramid
- I forbid it.
> unstack pyramid anyway
- The pyramid vanishes, probably to spite your insolence. Get on with the adventure.
> pout
- You pout for a while.
- ...
- Are you done yet?

> no
- ...
- How about now?

> no
- Too bad. Static crackles out of a watch on your wrist you would have noticed earlier if you weren't wasting time.
- "Testing. You there?" The voice sounds vaguely familiar...
> poke watch
- You fumble around with the buttons a bit. The voice speaks again. "Agent Crawler, please respond. If you are under duress, it has been a pleasure serving with you."
- The watch starts heating of its own accord. Between the name and this...now you remember. Junior member of special operations team Blue Depths, agent A. 'Crawler'...although your mission still escapes memory.
> ask about mission
- The voice sounds greatly relieved upon deactivating the bomb in the watch after hearing from you, and tells you as much.
- Apparently you were here to check on Darkness's plans to force hostage Aether scientists to create a four-dimensional construction and use it as a torture device. That was probably the thing that came out of the pyramid and attacked you earlier.
- Before the conversation can continue, though, the doorknob turns.
> hide with table
- Springing to action, training back in mind, you run over and flip the table to use it as cover. Probably a good idea; the guard who arrives has a dagger in hand, five more in his belt, and from what you know about Darkness...he probably knows how to aim them.
> charge him
- You reach to your own belt...and, finding yourself well-equipped with water, smirk softly. You fly out from behind the improvised barricade, raining sharp and cold with your Ice Bolts.
- Quick, what do you do next?
> get out
- Jabbing the distracted guard in the shoulder with an icicle and leaving it there, you run by through the open door. Forget the room, the mission is more important now.
- Now you're in a hallway, lined with many doors. To your right there's a T-intersection, while far to the left the corridor turns off to the left again. Going quickly would be a good idea. What now?
> go left
- Going to try any of the doors along the way?
> no
- The intersection has another hall of doors if you turn left, but one single door at the end of the right branch. Which way?
> right
- You approach the sole door at speed, footsteps sounding behind you. What now?
> break door
- Momentum isn't in your skillset, strictly speaking, but you ram through the door nonetheless. That's going to leave a mark...
- The next room is a small plain chamber with smooth metal walls and another door. The guard is also right behind you!
> attack guard with secret weapon
- ...it's a good thing you have a secret weapon to attack with at all.
- Summoning your Trident (and feeling the air dry a little), you spin and catch the guard's arm before the dagger finds your back.
- Pressing your opportunity, you remember your two-type training. With one hand on the metal wall, you jab your armament towards the guard.
- The floor shakes and half his complement of daggers go flying, including the one he was holding.
He's fairly defenseless in this startled state.
> spear him
- As you're about to deliver the finishing blow, a hiss from behind catches your attention. The other door is still shut, and the noise seems to come from another vent cover you didn't quite notice in the ceiling.
- An acrid scent quickly reaches you at about the same time the guard begins coughing and retching; your stomach turns and you'd know that smell anywhere. Poison.
> go through other door
- Your head is already feeling light as you walk to the other side of the toxic chamber; whatever supplies Death pitched in here, they're pretty...potent...
- The door is opened to a maintenance area, but you're starting to have trouble seeing.
> heal quick somehow
- There's enough clarity in the noxious fog to remember that you're a Water elemental, which means you are capable of stopping poison in its tracks.
- Though shaky, you raise a vial to your lips, remembering the purity of the water, remembering to Purify...

- It's not immediate, but the mental haze fades and you can move again.
> look for path
- Besides the way you came in, this room doesn't seem to lead to anywhere except the vent system.
> go vent
- What, you want to complain to your liason at HQ? Unless you mean go 'in' vent, in which case, say as much.
> go in vent
- You head into the vent system. It's pretty dark in here, but at least doesn't seem dangerous. You reach an intersection. Do you want to go north (backtrack), west, east, or south?
> go west
- At the next junction in the vent maze, you may go north, east (backtrack), or south. There is a whirring echo from the south and a faint light in the north.
> north
- You're getting further in the vents, so you have to crawl.
> crawl north
- While moving forward, a loose panel gives way. You drop from the vent shaft and land in another room similar to the one in which you awoke, but no table to take cover with this time.
- You are in a locked room. Escape.
> RAAAAAAAGE
- 'RAAAAAAAGE' is not a valid command.
> QUIT
- Are you sure you want to quit? Progress will not be saved. (y/n)
> Y
« Last Edit: March 06, 2016, 10:11:54 pm by Silver Emerald »
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

Offline majofa

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226519#msg1226519
« Reply #9 on: March 06, 2016, 09:14:19 pm »
Yes! The difference in color makes it an easier read and more appealing to the eyes. :D

The text needs to be bigger, though.

Offline JonathanCrazyJ

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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226521#msg1226521
« Reply #10 on: March 06, 2016, 09:17:12 pm »
- You are in a locked room. Escape.
> look


This
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Re: [Round 2] Writer Task https://elementscommunity.org/forum/index.php?topic=61346.msg1226528#msg1226528
« Reply #11 on: March 06, 2016, 10:13:23 pm »
Current draft in the OP is now completely colored and has been compressed down to just over 100 lines. (103 to be exact.)
The point isn't that the glass is half full or half empty. The point is that it's refillable!

Pen, keyboard, typewriter...the tools of my trade for the construction of worlds.
"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic." - A.W.P.B.D.

 

anything
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